Look at the time right now. What were you doing exactly one minute ago?
Our lives are made up of a collection of minutes, and our relationships are no different.
"Small things often" is a phrase that many successful couples carry throughout their day. How you press into this moment in your relationship is the fuel that can make this minute matter. We can love well by loving often. So, what does this look like?
P R A C T I C E
Imagine for a moment what it would feel like to be presented with a vase of 2 dozen roses. Now think about what it would be like to be surprised by receiving one rose each day for nearly a month.
"Small things often" can be simple and direct, which makes it an easy way to enhance your relationship just by paying attention to this minute and how it can improve your connection with the one you love.
HOW TO USE THIS LIST OF SMALL THINGS OFTEN:
Choose 30 things from the list and do 1 thing every day for the next 30 days.
Give this list as a gift to a newly married couple.
Use 3 or 4 of these ideas as a fun Valentine’s Day surprise.
Print out the list (get a printable download HERE and cut each idea into a strip of paper. Pull out one idea a week and plan to make it happen.
- a well-timed compliment
- a thank you note
- an extra-long hug
- taking the extra minute to wipe down the shower when you're finished
- stopping to fill up the gas tank
- grabbing her favorite candy bar at the checkout counter
- holding hands while driving
- taking over a household chore
- humming "your song"
- complimenting your partner in public but within earshot
- turning off your phones for a meal together
- pillow talk
- a massage
- love notes via text or gif to touch base through the day
- save your favorite shows to watch together as a date night, outfitted with snacks and blankets
- buy his favorite gum for the car
- listen for her favorite song on the radio and let her know you listened to the whole thing (and maybe even sang the lyrics)
- buy a stack of cards at the dollar store and mail them to your partner randomly throughout the month
- give special attention to your partner when she is sick or discouraged (perhaps putting together a get-well box of her favorite things)
- get a stack of post-its and place love notes in places he'll find them and smile
- Turn off her alarm on the weekend and let her sleep in
- Re-stock the toilet paper and draw a heart on the top sheet
- buy his favorite coffee creamer
- wear her favorite cologne
- change the sheets and spray the pillows lightly with pillow mist or linen spray
- pick a flower from the garden and place it in the house
- light a candle during dinner
- start his car to warm it or scrape the ice from the windows
put a note in his shirt pocket
get a stack of cards from the Dollar Store (2 cards for $1) mail or hand deliver the cards
purchase something from her favorite online store for her
put toothpaste on his toothbrush as he's getting ready for the day
make her coffeeput his favorite show on the watchlist of your streaming tv provider
put his favorite show on the watchlist of your streaming tv provider
charge his phone as soon as he gets home from work to prepare for "potty break/social media catch up"
create a pandora or spotify station with her favorite songs (the modern-day mixtape)
send a selfie picture with an inside joke only you two would know
download an app that makes your mobile or social media pics into postcards and send him photos of the two of you or memories you've created together
give each other a full-body one-minute bear hug
listen to his interests and ask questions with eagerness
change the sheets together and lie in the bed afterward enjoying Clean Sheet Day together
send emails to each other with no other agenda but to say what you love or appreciate one another
lean on each other while watching your favorite show
3 words: spontaneous dance party
Make her favorite meal
Wear his favorite color
set the table with a tablecloth and ambient music to enjoy a special meal, even when it may be pizza (again)
look at her pinterest boards and buy one of the items
check his amazon.com wishlist and buy one of the items
watch youTube videos that will make both of you laugh till you cry
For as they say in Tibet, "If you take care of the minutes, the years will take care of themselves."