For many years, studies have observed how couples respond to the ‘bad news’ of life - the challenges, traumas, arguments and frustrations that can come along in any relationship.  However, how we respond to each other’s successes may be even more important for the well-being of your partnership. 

In fact, those partners who are excited and encouraging of their other half’s successes and achievements seem to have a much better relationship. 

Scientists have found that couples who actively celebrate good news, instead of being dismissive or passive about it, have healthier partnerships.

An "active-constructive" response is the best one - for example, acknowledge how hard they have worked, and congratulate on what they have achieved.

Respond warmly, and be engaged - a “passive-constructive” would be a lukewarm “Oh, that’s good” while you’re distracted with something else. Give the other person your attention and enthusiasm.

Even less successful is a “passive-destructive” reaction where you basically ignore the good news, along the lines of “OK. By the way X happened to me today.”

Celebrating a partner’s good news as if it was your own will give them a huge emotional and mental boost, but playing it down or negating it can leave them cold, and cause rifts that would be increasingly hard to mend.

When we look for support from each other, it is showing vulnerability and acknowledging that we can’t do it all alone.

We need the other person to take joy in us, especially during those hard-fought life gains.