What is the point of mindfulness? The main goal is to remove yourself from any ongoing cycle of busyness and distraction, take a step back, and observe your life and your choices. It is an acknowledgment in part that being mindful isn’t the distraction,  but that all the chaos around you is really what distracts you from the important ‘work’ of understanding yourself. 

You aren’t trying to get yourself into any particular state of mind or extreme monk-like lifestyle; this view of mindfulness is off putting for many people and not how mindfulness works in reality - like anything, there are always a few examples of people taking it to extremes, but that is often more personality based than necessary practice. 

Instead of reaching for a particular destination, mindfulness just requires us to stay in the present moment, paying attention to how we are thinking and feeling. 

Look at it this way: you go to a concert by your favourite performer, or to the theatre to see a great play. Or on a vacation to a place of great beauty. Instead of trying to take photos and video clips, wondering how you’ll best share what you’re doing on social media or with your friends, you put your phone down and JUST ENJOY THE MOMENT. That, my friends, is mindfulness. 

It is putting away that ‘FOMO’ (fear of missing out) where you are driven by what other people think or what you expect. 

It is silencing that inner critic who stops you going for that job, for trying that new thing.

It is putting away JUDGEMENT. 

Our minds can be the worst possible version of a sportscaster, telling us all the wrong things, all of our failings and reminding us of times situations went awry. It tells us we aren’t good enough, but omits to tell us the full truth. The urge to label everything as either negative or positive, instead of a neutral “this is something that happened” is very powerful. It is also unnecessary. 

In mindfulness, you can take a more impartial view. Pay attention to the thoughts, feelings, mental pictures, emotions and memories without criticism or judgement. You notice everything that comes up, but you don’t allot more or less importance to those things, they just “are”. 

In choosing not to judge, we also choose not to step back into the cycle of reacting to those feelings. Instead of shelving those feelings, denying and ignoring them until they build up and explode relentlessly through our door, we recognise them. We acknowledge them and how we genuinely feel and how we normally react. And that’s ok. 

We always continue to assess ourselves - apparently humans come with an inbuilt negativity bias, an inherent cautiousness. Judgement is a choice, and we will probably lean more toward doing it than not. However, it is also a choice to become more impartial as part of that process and to let those feelings or thoughts continue to move on.

Instead of dwelling on them and becoming angrier, sadder, or disempowered, you see them, recognize them, and let them float away.