PARENTING THURSDAY: Accentuate The Positive

It seems like we are constantly bombarded with messages that there is something wrong or that something needs to be fixed or improved in our lives.   This also stretches into parenting, where it can (at times) seem that we are more governed by fear of what our children can't do, rather than pride in what they are capable of. Nowadays parenting can be about avoiding a whole host of parenting blunders and being hyper vigilant about potential issues.

Rather than focusing on our child's weaknesses and trying to minimize them, what if we’re looking at things in an upside down way? What happens if we instead identify and develop his or her strengths rather than focusing on what they lack?

Often, we as parents become hyperaware of all the things our children aren't able to do, and are even more aware of all the things they “should” be able to do.

We spend time identifying their weaknesses and believe we help our child if we can somehow eliminate or lessen them. In reality, if we spend lots of time looking at the negatives, we become demoralised and overwhelmed.

It is important to look at what children can accomplish rather than fixate on all that they cannot, giving them an opportunity to succeed, regardless of what obstacles they face.

Parenting based on strengths is an idea acknowledging that each child has unique skills and talents, and that these should be recognised and developed. Rather than focusing on identifying and tackling challenges, parents can cultivate a positive and successful mindset for their children by looking at their natural abilities and personal affinities and preferences.

Parents who utilize a strengths-based approach have many benefits: If our children only hear negative words, how will they become self-confident? Getting our kids' attention off the negatives and placing it on what they can do nurtures a healthy mindset and boosts their self-esteem. It teaches them to focus on their gifts and abilities instead of their weaknesses.

Your relationship with your child will improve greatly when you acknowledge their strengths and don't constantly point out their shortcomings. Children will feel more confident about themselves and their abilities as you encourage them to develop confidence. Together, your relationship will grow based on potential, support and love.

By engaging in strengths-based activities, kids and parents will be happier. They will feel more confident and capable of managing their abilities, a factor that contributes to a more resilient and independent lifestyle. Also, parents will become more confident in themselves, proud of their children, and emboldened in their parenting.

It's important for kids to recognise their strengths and develop them so they can potentially take up higher studies, extracurricular activities and pursue special interests aligned to their preferences in future.

As mental health issues, such as anxiety and depression, are on the increase, parents can struggle to support their kids, especially in tough adolescent years. A strengths-based approach to parenting can benefit both kids and parents by helping cultivate positive mental health behaviors and reduce the risk of mental health problems later in life.

Taking a strengths based approach to parenting makes sense, particularly during these challenging times.  All this negativity can be overwhelming enough, who needs even more?