MINDFULNESS MONDAY: Stop, Look and Listen

Nowadays, with constant distractions everywhere, it's rare to feel truly listened to, heard and valued when we speak. Being truly attentive is a rarity in today's society. In order to tap into these moments of personal connection, we must first learn how to actively listen to others.  As we give others our full attention and listen closely to what they have to say, we can truly demonstrate that we are not only interested in what they have to say, but we also value it.

We easily let our everyday lives become robotic. When we meet a friend for a drink, for example, we settle into a familiar routine.  It’s all happened before, we know how the conversation will probably flow, we ease off the accelerator and go into automatic pilot. While it’s great and necessary that we have people in our lives that make us feel comfortable in their company, as a result, we are unable to be truly present and veer off from engaging with them in an authentic manner.

To choose not to go into the slipstream of routine, we find that suddenly, familiar situations that would have been par for the course or even a repeat of the same conversations, become a source of delight when we don't treat every situation as a rehash of the last.  It becomes a new opportunity for your relationship.  When tuned in to active and mindful listening, it can turn familiar activities into unique experiences for yourself and others. You will thus be able to better connect and communicate with those closest to you.

In order to really hear what someone else has to say, it means letting go of any agenda, preconceived ideas or judgmental attitudes you may have had. It means creating space that will allow you to hear what the person is REALLY saying. We need to first be aware of ourselves and our own minds as well as our own inner dialogues.

Once we are able to acknowledge and see our own inner voice for what it is, then we can learn how to quiet it sufficiently so we can begin to be open to the voice of others.

In order to truly listen to the other person, you need to choose and be willing to truly enter into the conversation.  Mindful listening requires us to demonstrate respect and genuine interest in what the other person is saying.

The practice of mindful listening can allow you to deepen your relationships with others because we seldom pay attention to others nowadays. In addition to helping them to feel valued, actively listening to someone else will encourage them to listen to you in return.