We can all experience those times when our confidence seems to take a nose-dive, and we feel terrible about ourselves and our potential. Our self-esteem seems to have fallen off the charts. When low self-esteem becomes chronic and ongoing, it can have a negative impact on our day-to-day life and on our mental wellbeing.

What is self-esteem?

Self-esteem is the opinion we have of ourselves. The word ‘esteem’ comes from the Latin aestimare - ‘to value, determine the worth of’. So - self-esteem is when you weigh up yourself and give an appraisal of your own worth and abilities.

When our self-esteem is good, we feel positive about ourselves and our ability to handle the situations around us. This creates healthy coping mechanisms where we can deal well with the ebb and flow of life.

When our self-esteem is low, we view ourselves negatively and with less abilities. Our criticism of self makes us feel unable to tackle challenges, and more likely to be completely thrown by negative events.

We can absorb all sorts of negative messages about ourselves from a very young ages - from our parents, siblings, teachers, the media and entertainment industry etc. Unfortunately these ideas can take root in our lives and make us feel that we are just not good enough.

When we feel negative about ourselves and our situation, because of these life obligations and unexpected problems (for example, we criticise our appearance, intelligence or skills), this is often referred to as having low self esteem. We begin to think that we’d feel better about ourselves if certain problems didn’t exist. Unfortunately, this is having things around the wrong way. Raising self-esteem can be worked upon, but how?

Boosting your self-esteem

- When we look down our mental checklist of tasks for the day, we can often put of certain things as they are things we don’t enjoy. Instead, why not do one of these things first? Finishing it and pushing through what you least look forward to will give a boost to your mindset, and make everything else seem even less challenging.

“You don’t have to accept the bad thoughts about yourself, you can challenge them and refuse them access. Bar their access through the door of your mind with positive thoughts instead.”

What are you good at? Do it, and do it often. Be consistent in engaging with the things that you enjoy and this can give you more of a ‘happiness buffer’ against the things you find more challenging.

Stay connected to those family and friends that are encouragers and more content in themselves. Make time to be around these type of people. Have a laugh, do things that are low-pressure.
Be aware of those thoughts in your head - are they negative or positive? Harmful or helpful? You don’t have to accept the bad thoughts about yourself, you can challenge them and refuse them access. Bar their access through the door of your mind with positive thoughts instead.
Talk it through. Persistent negative thoughts can be ultimately crippling. Talking to friends can help, but entrenched low self-esteem might require help from a therapist to show ways of breaking the cycle.

When we feel better about ourselves through higher self-esteem, we regain a sense that our goals can be met and we can take on challenges.
Rediscover that you are capable.